A facet of British life I dislike, and one I only realised was present after travelling a lot, is the false, overdone personality of many British people.

It really is true that we are overpolite, over nice, and yet distant, hard to approach and cold.

We are taught, subtly and overtly, to present a squeaky-clean front to the world, to be polite, to smile even when we don’t want to, to act false, to say please and thankyou even in the most mundane contexts.

And I think this both makes us deeply inauthentic and masks the exact opposite desires that remain in us. I think it makes us up tight, boring and repulsive. And it leaves us all swimming in a social muck, a heap of bullshit that contorts and confuses.

You can see through this facade by openly violating the tacit British social norms in front of a squeaky-clean personality.

You see, when a British person notices you’re not being British and are failing to uphold the social norms of overpoliteness and civility, they will get very passive aggressive. They will make some underhand comment designed to make you feel guilty without you realising what they did. It’s like a polite insult, a gentle death sentence.

Example: the next time you’re in the UK and someone performs a small act of civility for you, like opening a door, do not say thank you. Do not look at them. Do not acknowledge their existence in any way. Just walk right through the door, looking straight ahead, giving no heed to the benevolent door-opener.

And you must listen carefully once you do this, because I can almost guarantee you’ll be met with a sarcastic “Thank you”.

This shows that behind this front is actually someone who is aggressive and intolerant. They don’t uphold the norms because they genuinely want to, but because they’ve built a false personality. They’ve become a social automaton who opens doors for people not out of kindness but to perpetuate mass social roboticness.

Not only that, I find us to be downright cold and repressed. We don’t open up. We conceal ourselves behind a bland social personality designed to be bearable but unremarkable. We don’t express our real emotions. We push them down because we fear their repercussions.

We’re quick to blurt out “How are you?” and fill in the blanks with a bearable but unremarkable answer, and can’t connect beyond that smallest of small talk.

Anyways, I think I’ve ranted quite enough. I didn’t mean to offend anyone. Please don’t be offended. I’m so terribly sorry. Have a nice day. Take care. And, of course, thank you.